Insects
Those could really kill someone. Kevin Ham was looking at a bunch of coconuts hanging from a palm tree at least three stories high on the opposite side of the road.
“I wonder how many people are killed each year by coconuts?”
“150”, Kevin’s girlfriend said, placing her phone back on the table. “But that might be a myth."
“What do you mean?”
“Well, they say that statistic was made up by people trying to defend sharks. Sharks kill less people than coconuts.”
Kevin looked up at the palm tree again and saw one of the heaviest coconuts fall to the ground with a thud.
Kevin Ham, 1981-2024, nobody special, killed by a coconut in his favorite place.
Kevin said goodbye to his girlfriend, Samantha, and climbed onto his scooter as she climbed onto hers. She was going to yoga; he, a massage. Samantha blew Kevin a kiss as she turned and rode in the opposite direction.
Kevin was alone. The wind in his hair. Flying through Bird Town. It wasn’t actually called that, but this is the name Kevin had given it for himself. Why Bird Town? There were scrawny white birds with long dirty beaks everywhere. A few were flying like Kevin, but most were tottering all over the road and dangling from the trees.
Kevin made it through Bird Town unscathed, despite almost running over the scrawniest little bird he had ever seen.
As he crossed the border, he said “Woof! Woof!” to one of his favorite dogs, waiting there like a sentinel.
Kevin turned the corner and felt something crawling in his shirt. Controlling the scooter with one hand, he investigated the situation. An insect. Quite big, crawling towards his throat.
Kevin skidded to the side of the road, as three cars stampeded by him.
Ripping off his shirt, Kevin saw something large topple down to the earth, collect itself, and then disappear into the crystal-clear sky.
Arriving at the massage parlor Kevin was polite. He was here because life was stressful and his muscles, nervous system, and brain absorb the stresses of life.
People get massages all the time.
The icy coldness of the towel made Kevin feel better. But then he noticed the line of shoes, sandals, etc., all more or less dirty, at the top of the stairs where he had left his own specimen.
Suddenly, Kevin felt bugs crawling over his skin.
Get yourself together. It’s only a massage. You promised Samantha.
“Are you ready, sir?”
Kevin mumbled something and complied. He tolerated having his feet cleaned and went where he was told to go.
Ethereal daydreams. Awake but falling asleep.
It’s like being drowned by the kindest waves.
“Is the pressure okay, sir?”
“Yes, it’s very good, thank you.”
“Okay, good.”
Suddenly, Kevin felt something like honey being spread all over his body. He was puzzled because he thought only one person was massaging him, but now it seemed like many. But he could not think clearly because someone was massaging his head in the most remarkable way. With each impression of the fingers, he would see colors, some that he had never seen before and could never describe again.
“Now massage is over".”
Kevin heard a door close. He waited for a moment in the darkness and then tried to raise his arms. They were tied to something, under the bed, and he couldn’t move. Then Kevin smelt something strange. He’d smelt it before when he was a child. What they used to call stink beetles. It was a very strange and unsettling smell that filled the room very quickly.
I wish a coconut had fallen on my head.
Kevin felt hands on his legs. Not hands, legs! He felt legs and segments of body sliding over him. He opened his eyes to see… a giant praying mantis staring down at him.
What a majestic thing!
Kevin’s thought was annihilated when the giant praying mantis decapitated him and ate his head.
The shoes were still lined up on the top step leading into the establishment, a temple beyond, sending sacred smoke billowing into the crystal-blue sky.